haven't done this in a while...

So like many other fanboys, I pre-ordered my copy of Modern Warfare 2. I wanted the special edition that comes with the night-vision goggles and all, but I wasn't ready to fork out $150. In hindsight, I probably should've picked it up with the NVGs, but oh well. I finished the game after two weeks of playing after work. I was rather disappointed with the ending, actually. I guess it leaves it hanging for MW3. I wish I could play online.

Tonight, I decided to sit down and play a game I downloaded earlier this year, that I never touched. I turned on Mega Man 9 to take a break from all the effects and complex gameplays; just two buttons, a direction pad, and nothing but fun. Or so I thought... Much to my chagrin, this supposed classic game beat me down and then some.

I didn't remember the original Mega Mans to be this hard. Mega Man 9 is harder than any other game I've played lately. It's so repetitive, tedious, and sucks up all your focus. It was actually stressful to play it cause the slightest mistake at the wrong time meant redoing all that you just did. I couldn't pass any of the levels.

What was supposed to be a nostalgic moment soon became a moment of frustration and helplessness... The fun ended with me cussing at Mega Man for not being able to jump high enough or being able to slide like Mega Man 4 could...

Needless to say, my time's been going more towards video games lately. But once the holidays start, I'll hopefully lay off the Xbox and get more productive til Montreal. I wish I knew what was in store for this year's break. Ugh... 2009 went by way too fast. It felt like yesterday that I was in Tremblant skiing. At least, it'll be a White Christmas this year, as we're supposedly getting dumped on tonight. Let's make a snowman.

cycle of life.

Bicycles... I regret ever buying that KHS hybrid two years ago for $500-600 cause for that price, I could've gotten a really decent road bike... But oh well. It's now my backup bike for anyone who's in town and wants to ride with me.

About a month ago now, I went with Tessar to buy an $80 12-speed VeloSport vintage bike in Scarborough, which was a really good deal, until the problems came flooding in a week later. A faceplant, warped rims, blown tire... Sigh. But it's still my favourite bike to ride, despite all the problems and grief it's given me. I'm keeping that baby and turning it into my every day bike. Gonna pimp it out. It's a bit of a project bike, but piece by piece. Just have to be patient.

As for the third bike, I bought it off of Craig's List, but I traded this metallic blue 59cm Raleigh Rampar for a 53cm frame metallic grey SIS L'Image road bike. It's considerably, smaller, but the 59cm frame was a bit big for me. And because of the small size of the SIS, I'll probably be turning it into a fixie, when I have the money. Hopefully by next spring, it'll be converted. Pictures to come...

I've been thinking about volunteering at CBN (Community Bicycle Network) and hopefully learn how to build and repair bikes so I can really start getting to know my bikes better; especially to maintain them. But I've spoken a lot about volunteering in the past and it's never happened so we'll see when it actually happens... haha.

The past two weeks have been blasts from the past. I saw some college friends from my very first year at Sheridan 7 years ago. I haven't seen these guys in forever. Hooking up with them was so fun but talking about the past really made me think about how old we are, and how long ago that was. It brought back up some really good times and people I had completely forgotten about. And just yesterday, I had dinner with a friend from high school who I have barely spoken to in almost 9 years. Brought some memories back. It's always a really fun time to catch up with people in person. Catching up with people through emails and Facebook just isn't the same, really.

Looking back at the high school days and the early college days, it almost feels like a dream; another life. Memory is weird like that... If you don't hold on to it, it'll fade like a forgotten dream in the morning. You need that spark to revive it from time to time. At least, the important ones; the good ones.

i remember it swell.

It's been pretty busy since I got back from Asia... I've been denying myself a lot of me time. Between work, friends, and family, it's been quite a challenge to get a full 6 or 7 hour sleep night. I also discovered a library of documentaries online. I'm a bit of a documentary freak, so I sacrificed quite a few of my sleeping hours watching these things.

I think all that lack of sleeping caught up with me Thursday night, when I was working from home and suddenly, I think a muscle just gave... I was having crazy chest pains everytime I breathed, preventing me from having a good night's sleep. It got worse Friday night after work on my way uptown in the subway, when it started to cramp up and made me breathe inconsistantly. It really hurt to breathe. When Tessar picked me up, I could hardly get 3 words out before needing another breath of air. After 4 hours at Scarborough Grace, the doctor took some x-rays and dismissed it as me having pulled a muscle. His prescription: two tylenols. Ass.

So for Aaron's bachelor party Saturday, I had to contain any sort of laughter as it causes chest pains through the inhales. Anyone who knows me knows it's hard for me to contain my emotions. The night was filled with fun and laughter. I was literally laughing with tears, holding my chest. It started getting worse near the end of the night, so I left shortly after midnight and slept for almost 12 hours. I think that cured the chest pains, though I'd like to think the laughter was the real remedy...

I'm not completely cured, as it still hurts to take fast deep breaths. As such, I haven't been able to yawm properly since Thursday. And when you're really running low on sleep, it gets pretty damn frustrating. One thing that's working to my advantage though, is sneezing. When I feel the sneeze coming, I can't help but inhale quickly, but then the chest pains kick in and cancel the sneeze to nothing. It hurts, but it's good, cause there's no spray damage all over my hands.

It seems 2009 is a popular year to get married. We saw two weddings in India, one in China, and I've seen countless numbers of brides and grooms roaming the streets of Toronto this summer; not to mention all the bachelor/bachelorette parties that I keep seeing. I've been trying to help my brother and my sister-in-law plan their reception in September and I gotta tell ya. It's a lot to think about. Especially when it's less than two months away... Can't wait to throw on that tux though. I still have to write my speech. Can't decide if I should say the speech in Chinese too... I'll have quite a bit of trouble with that, considering I can't read Chinese, so even cue cards wouldn't be able to save me. I know this sounds strange coming from a guy, but I think I'm getting a bit of wedding fever... Sigh.

travel journal: part 3

In the span of a couple of days, a lot of things have happened. Michael Jackson's sudden death was one of the most talked. It's really too bad that he couldn't have finished his last tour beforehand... Being the fan that I am, I'm sad to see him go; though at the same time, it's good he finally found some sort of peace from this unforgiving world. His music will always rock my world and his dancing will always be off the wall. Thanks for changing the world the way you did.

Speaking of change, I should get back to trying to finish the travel journal. This next bit changed the way I view my life quite a bit. India really opened my eyes as to how good I have it in North America.

Day 6: The real adventure begins.
We arrived at Bangkok Airport from Guang Zhou at 2:30am. We had to wait for the Air India booth to open at 8:30am, so we decided to save ourselves some money and crash at the airport. It felt a little nomadic and bummish with our backpacks, chilling and sleeping at the airport. The hours passed by slowly but we tried to pass our time joking around and sleeping. I had a hard time sleeping though. We would've hung out at the internet station if it wasn't so damn expensive. It was 100 Thai Baht for 20 minutes or 300 Baht for an hour. That's about $9 USD/hour. To use the internet... Rip off.

We originally wanted to fly to Kolkata but then there were cheap seats available to New Delhi for 12:55pm. So we bought the tickets and boarded the flight. I found the stewardesses' on Air India weren't as pleasant, but we got service nonetheless, so I can't complain.

We got off the plane to 39°C heat... It was HAWT as shit! But at least it was dry heat as opposed to Hong Kong's humid heat. We went through security fine, but then it went downhill from there... We lost a chunk of money due to currency exchange fees, and we went on a prepaid taxi service with a driver who didn't know how to get to our hotel. At that point in our day, we were still feeling somewhat adventurous and feeling that ounce of excitement of something so new, different, and unknown. Until the driver dropped us off in the middle of a busy intersection in Old Delhi. He told us to make a left and walk for 5 minutes and that the hotel should be there. We argued with him to drop us off in front of the hotel, but he would have none of it. He insisted taxis weren't allowed on that road. We got frustrated and stepped out of the vehicle to grab our backpacks.

The stupid cabbie had the nerve to ask for tip. We left him and kept walking. Before today, I had never seen this kind of poverty. Kids running around the streets, rickshaw taxis everywhere, motorcycles, tuc-tuc taxis, lots of stray dogs and men, and many many more shameless stares and leers at us. It made it really uncomfortable to walk through the area. Kids would run by and yell something at us, street vendors would try to get our attention and sell us shit. All senses were overstimulated by the sights, sounds, smell. That sense of excitement quickly turned to fear.

We eventually ran into a couple of police officers after walking 10 minutes down that street. They informed us that Hotel Broadway was a 15 to 20 minutes walk back the way we came. So basically, the taxi driver should've told us to turn right and walk for 5 minutes... We were not pleased. After some heckling and such from people as they drove/walked by, we found the hotel. Oh, there was also a security guard who took a photo of my female cousin with his cellphone camera as we walked by. Creep.

It's a hell of an experience so far, I must say... I'm really starting to miss home now. We've only been in India for a few hours now and I find it quite mentally stressful already.

Day 7: Indian Summer.
We woke up fairly early to pack a few things and plan our day. It was decided that we would walk to Connaught Place since there are a lot more tourists in that area. My cousin also decided to wear a nice dress with a thin sweater overtop to be less revealing. But instead, she built quite a fanbase for herself. Men and boys of all ages looked her up and down (mainly down)... The women and girls also stared. Unlike North America though, if you make eye-contact, they don't look away. Since we were Chinese and pale skinned, we obviously stood out from the crowd. We got got many stares, but my cousin got the most. It was so bad it made all four of us uncomfortable.

We got lost a few times on the way but we reached the New Delhi train station. Among the mostly dirty-civilians we saw everywhere, a strange clean and well-dressed man approached us and spoke to my brother. We decided to go with him as he told us he works in Block N of Connaught Place and that Block P, where we were headed to, was on the way. He lead us into the metro and got us to Block P. What's funny was that he was on the phone quite frequently in the metro ride. After he dropped us off and headed back to work, another man approached us almost immediately and started talking to us. He was just as friendly as the other man. We told him what we were looking for and he lead us to the tourism centre. I'm 85% to 90% sure that those two men worked together to get us there and they probably collect commission from that tourism centre...

Anyway, after much inquiries and bartering, we ended up with a complete 8 day tour of India. This included a flight to Kashmir, then seeing the "Golden Triangle Tour" from Delhi to Jaipur to Agra. Then it's an overnight train to Varanasi to see the Ganges and ride elephants, then another overnight train to Kolkata to catch our flight to Bangkok. The price of the tour probably could've been cheaper, but us being from North America, it was cheap in our standards. In Indian standards, however, we most likely got ripped off pretty damn good. But still, thanks to my brother, the price was lowered significantly from the original.

This deal also included a day tour of Old and New Delhi for the rest of today. We saw Humayans Tomb, Gandhi's Smirt, and ate at a touristy restaurant (more expensive in Indian standards). We then went to see Red Fort, and walked through the park where Gandhi was cremated, saw India Gate, and then drove by the President's Palace. Of course, our day was filled with shameless stares and heckling from beggars and vendors.

The sites were pretty nice. The structures were historic and great and unlike anything I've seen before. The heat was pretty insane. Our driver told us that it was a really hot time of the year. Even him, being a local, was struggling to keep cool. Things I've noticed was that the men pissed anywhere in public, there were stray dogs everywhere, the traffic was chaotic, the men to women ratio was pretty ridiculous, many of the locals thought we were Japanese and would yell "konichiwa" at us. We feared for my cousin quite a bit as we walked down the streets and we were still so uncomfortable everywhere we walked. Everytime I would see a foreign white person at some of the touristy areas, a part of me wanted to run up to them and latch on to them...

travel journal: part 2

I'm home safe and sound after a month-long trip. I'm still a little jetlagged, as I keep passing out before 10pm and waking up early in the morning... I'm trying to find time to see what the damages were to my finances from this trip, to unpack and to organize myself. Starting work right away and not giving myself time to recover from jetlag was a bit of a bad idea, but still, at least I have an income again! Here's the second part of the travel journal. Going to try and write what I can before I leave to get my braces taken off... Monumental day!!

Day 4: I can see clearly now the rain will come
Rain day 2. Woke up at 7am. We stayed the night and will be spending our nights at a relative's house in Guang Zhou. As we were leaving, there was a disgusting giant spider that came running across the kitchen. I didn't see it alive as I was putting my shoes on. But I saw our auntie kill it with her slipper and these giant legs, the size of a tarantula, all twitching and shit. So nasty. I couldn't stop thinking about it for the rest of the day...

We took a bus to go to this area of the city where it seemed a lot less run down. There were more streetshops. After walking around for a bit, we went into this four story mall that sold nothing but glasses frames. It was crazy how cheap everything was in Guang Zhou! For the frames that I got, I paid 85 RMB which amounts to roughly $14 USD. I'm going back there tomorrow to get the lenses fitted. I think it'll be around 390-500 RMB ($65-83 USD).

We ran a little late for lunch to meet up with more relatives. We ate at a Japanese barbecue restaurant, owned by a Japanese man, but could also speak Canto and Mando. It was much like the Toronto Korean barbecues, but instead of a gas grill, they used hot coals with a cross-wire grill. Everything was uber delicious. The relatives were great and very hospitable. Some I had never met before, and a few others, I hadn't seen in ten years.

After lunch, our distant uncle took us to a driving range. On our way there, his driving was pretty insane! He made his own lane, drove onto oncoming traffic; it felt like a rollercoaster. Thankfully, we arrived alive to hit some golf balls into the wet grass, as it was still drizzling a little. Afterwards, we went out for dinner at McDonald's with my mom's middle school friend, whom I've met once before.

I've noticed in Guang Zhou that the police here is not intimidating at all, except for the fact that they could be corrupt, but that's all preconceived thoughts. In terms of their uniforms and just looks, they wore no bullet proof vests, they seemed older and less fit, and the uniforms in general were not that intimidating. My cousin was much thicker than most of the officers there. Though I'm sure they could still kick my ass... Another thing is the service here; it's so efficient and great. It's probably due to the fact that the employees are overstaffed because of cheap labour, so they have to provide excellent service due to competition.


Day 5: Guang Zhou, Rain City
Third day in GZ and once again, I wake up to the sound of rainfall. I think it's been cemented in my head now that GZ, ponchoes and bicycles, and rain go hand-in-hand. I haven't truly missed home yet, though I have thought about it a few times, mainly due to the living conditions here. It makes me think about how good we have it in North America. I've realized now that I'm quite a princess for cleanliness. I always thought I'd be able to handle something like this since I've always loved camping, but I guess outdoors dirtiness in is a totally different kind of dirtiness from urban dirtiness. But I think this is only the beginning, as India I'm sure will be much worse. So I guess this will be a nice transition to get my prepared for what's to come.

The sky cleared up a bit as we stepped out to pick up our glasses, but then started to pour again shortly after. Our auntie took us to this park where my parents went to on their first date at Shamian Park. It was beautiful. My dad's such a romantic, heheh. I wonder what it looked like back then... The rain had dissipated by then, making way for a beautiful view of the riverside, though the water could have been less brown and murky. It made me want to hear stores about the details of how my parents met. I've only heard a couple of stories.

We met up with my dad's cousin later and he treated us to a fancy dinner. It was so good... The service again, was excellent. We had a lot of fun in GZ on this last day, although I miss having showers. I say this because I only showered one day while I was here because the heater wasn't working, and also because you had to stand over the squatter toilet to shower. The squatter toilet, you have to manually pour water into it to flush, and after a number 2, you can only imagine the type of smell that comes out of there... Like I said, I'm a bit of a princess when it comes to these things... Oh and GZ was pretty hot too, so the days I didn't shower, I used a wet towel to wipe myself down instead.

We packed our backpacks after dinner and caught our flight to Bangkok to lay over to India. We didn't purchase out tickets beforehand, and it's in the middle of the night, so we have to wait until the next flight and purchase the tickets then. We'll be flying Air India, I believe.

travel journal: part 1

Sine leaving for the trip for Asia, it's been really really fast-paced and I haven't really had a chance to use internet all that much, so I've been writing in a journal to keep track of my observations and events. I'm just going to type it out here.


DAY 0.5: Leaving on a jet plane
I got to the airport 3 hours early since they say that you should do that for international flights. I got to the airport at 6:40am and was checked in, went through security and reached the waiting area by 6:55am... It was quite a long wait from there.

Lift off was at 10:30am and it was a rough flight over. 15.5 hours of air time with 3 meals and barely any sleep. I tried to drink some wine to put myself to sleep but no such luck. So we watched movie after movie. One of the movies was Ip Man starring Donnie Yuen. Amazing fight scenes, highly emotional. Forget Jet Li and Jacky Chan.


DAY 1: Hong Kong
We reached HK early in the morning local time. The subway right from the airport to our hotel area was sweet. It was so clean, well-maintained, and lots of room. TTC sucks compared to this. We walked over to the South Pacific Hotel, checked in, and walked around while waiting for Vincy to meet up wit us. The hotel rooms were a tad small, but pretty good for HK. It was pretty humid and warm there. Cockroaches running around the sidewalk, lots of people, a few stares here and there, but nothing too bad. It really sucked we couldn't read the menu signs for dinner, but at least we could speak and understand quite well. Free internet in the subway is awesome. We were recommended a place by a friend called King's Hotel and it was so weird. It almost felt like a sex hotel... It was one floor, and no hallways. As soon as you open the room door, it's the lobby. These rooms were all pimped out, and the workers weresurprised to see the 4 of us walk in...


DAY 2: HK shopping
We started the day by going to a cafe lounge for breakfast to use their complimentary computers. We noticed that school uniforms are really ugly in HK. We later met up with some friends and went shopping. First stop was at UNIQLO. Great clothing for a pretty cheap price. Felt like H&M but a lot better, though their t-shirts are a bit too wide for my body... Shame... I thought we had already adjusted to the time change since we didn't feel tired much, but by 6pm, it hit us hard. We passed out from 6:30pm til 10:30pm. Then we were wide awake.

We went out to Lang Kwai Fung to party it up with some foreigners. It was pretty crazy. Lots of white people and CBCs, lots of pubs, lots of booze and drunkards. We stayed out pretty late, playing Chinese drinking games (our local HK friends taught us) and drank the night away.

HK has an urban/modern feel, but at the same time, very grungy. Almost like Chinatown, realy. It's humid and hot, and I've decided I can't live here. Too many people and no sidewalk space. It gets rather frustrating when you're in a hurry. I can't even imagine what India will be like.


DAY 3: Arrival to Guang Zhou
Rain. We packed up our bags and went out for breakfast. By 12:30pm, we were on the bus to Mainland China. The coach was uber nice. It was brand new with leather seats, soft head cushions, reclines 5 times more than a crappy Greyhound coach would in North America. Funny how that works. Everything about that coach was superior. It even has a side door in the back to let people in too! Only thing missing was a washroom.

The highways were filled with rather large billboard signs everywhere with large Chinese fonts. The billboards were at least twice the size of North American billboards. It was overpowering...

Guang Zhou isn't what I remembered ten years ago. I don't remember much of it from then to begin with, just that there were a lot of constructions sites back then. Now, it reminds me of HK, with the modern tall high-rises mixed with grungy old buildings. Everything is cheap here, especially the food. The girls are much cuter than Hong Kong girls for some reason. Hannah, if you're reading this, you're right about the toilets in China. Kinda gross...

asiabound - day 0: toronto.

It's 4am... I'm still up. Cleared all my photos from my camera, all packed except for the stuff I need in the morning. Got my shots, my pills, my documents. There was a mix of feelings between excitement and nervousness earlier, but now, I just feel too tired to feel either. Why bother sleeping when I have to be up in an hour and there's a grueling 15.5 hour flight waiting for me?

Essentially, the itinerary's going to look something like this: land in Hong Kong and spend about 3 days there, then fly to India for a bit more than a week to see Darjeeling, Agra, Kolkata, Dheli, and Varanasi. Then it's off to Thailand to see some beaches and relax/backpack for about a week and half. After Thailand, we hit up Macau for a day then back to HK to catch our flight to Guang Zhou, China to visit some relatives for a couple of days. Then back to HK to shop til we drop.

Heh... As I'm typing this, the feeling of excitement is starting to come back. Funny how that works. The thing that worries me and gets me a little nervous is the thieving and the kid beggars. I've been told that they are quite relentless, and the whole ordeal is that you know by giving them money, you'll attract a swarm, and you're only fueling the cycle. But if you don't give them anything, you feel heartless, torn, and helpless to help these kids.

I think backpacking through some of the rural areas of India will really open my eyes. Which for me is part of the purpose of this trip. I'm hoping in Thailand we'll get to rent some bicycles and bike around the local areas.

Anyway. It's already 4:24am... I still have to shave my head. I'll try to update when I can. Photos will probably get updated on FB faster than posts on this blog, but I do intend on writing a traveling journal while on this trip. Toodles.

hb.eL.

Lots of last minute things to do... Not really planning on sleeping, really. Gotta leave the apartment in 6 hours. Getting butterflies in my stomach...

honster's list.

The itinerary: HK, India, Thailand, China, HK.

So far, everything just fits perfectly in my duffel bag... Hopefully I can find a backpack that'll be around this size...

Important
• Passport
• Flight ticket
• Insurance papers
• Moola
• Anti-malarial pills

Clothes
• 2 t-shirts
• 4 undies
• 3 socks
• 1 jeans
• 1 shorts
• 1 long sleeve t
• 1 Poncho/raincoat
• 1 sandals
• 1 shorts (worn)
• 1 shoes (worn)
• 1 belt (worn)
• 1 hat (worn)
• 1 socks (worn)
• 1 undies (worn)
• 1 t-shirt (worn)

Toiletries
• towel
• toilet paper rolls x2
• floss
• toothbrush
• toothpaste
• razor
• deodorant
• cologne
• bodywash
• SPF lip balm

Accessories
• garbage bag
• ipod
• earphones
• camera
• camera charger
• camera battery/memory stick
• fanny pack
• mini-sketch book
• pen & pencil
• book
• outlet converter
• ipod & camera wire
• first aid kit
• travel pack hand sanitizer
• nail clippers
• ziplocks
• phone
• laundry powder
• tea tree oil
• bug spray
• sun screen
• travel thermos

the three days rule

Until two years ago, I never knew what the 3 days rule was. But when my friend told me about it, it all made sense.

//Paraphrased
Me: So you're saying I shouldn't call tomorrow (Saturday) for a lunch date Monday?
Friend: No man. It's all about timing. You call too soon, you seem desperate. You wait too long, she loses interest.


I went with the 3 days rule. I got called out on it months down the road; it was a good laugh..

How I Met Your Mother discusses the 3 days rule. But it has a more valid reason why one should abide by it. Because Jesus wants us to wait 3 days...

just another lush day.

It's been nothing but a smile on a face lately. Reason being that when something in your life takes a right turn, it affects everything else in your life: your state of mind, your relationships, your health and so on. Everything about you brightens up. I couldn't ask for more at this moment. I know I say this a lot but I could never be thankful enough for the people in my life.

As for work, it's been nothing but faaaanntastic! Working on a lot of animations and with great designers. My only complaint is that I really miss working near Chinatown. Bay/Bloor is nothing but food courts and it's sad that we even have nicknames for the two food courts... sigh... There's a Pho Hung across the street from the ROM so I might end up going there one of these days. Just have to convince the co-workers to make that trek there. The convincing part will be a bit difficult, as I seem to be the only one who gets excited over pho.

I rode my first fixie bike Wednesday night. Tessar was awesome enough to teach me how to skid-stop and such. I gotta say... It's so weird to ride a fixed gear bike. I'd forget for a split second that I can't stop pedaling, but then I'd get a reminder as the pedal kicks your leg up as you try to rest up. I can't even imagine what it'd be like going downhill!! BUT I do want one now... The frame is soooo light!! My thighs are still sore from all that practice with the skid-stops. Also, a link that was sent to me from Tessar: Bamboo Bike Studio. Innovatively green ideas. So awesome. I want one of those too...

I made a hilarious video for my good friend John Thai's 26th birthday and played it for him and his friends at the party. I know it's on Facebook and that many of you have already seen it, but for you randoms who stumble upon my blog about nothing, hopefully this will at least make you smile... Enjoy!

no time left for you.

Hmm.... So much to go on about. It's been a pretty busy month, between my portfolio, work, and my personal life. Luckily I was only unemployed for 3 weeks, thanks to the great friends that I have. It's another new beginning, meeting great people and seeing great work. Definitely better work environment to say the least.

Been doing a lot of things on my own lately, and have been really enjoying the me time. Biking to the beaches and discovering new places around Toronto is always fun. Earth Hour was pretty cool too, though I was pretty disappointed when I left Nathan Phillips Square early that practically everywhere else in Toronto was still brightly lit.

Went to DC with my brother, aunt and uncle and the folks over the long weekend. It was... hmmm, interesting...? All I have to say is that I'm never going on another Chinese bus tour ever again. It was so horribly organized. The tour guide was brutal and really took away from an experience that could have been decent. I was hoping for something relaxing since work and freelance combined have been pretty overwhelming. It was the complete opposite. It's definitely an experience I don't want to go through again.

We only had 2 hours to shop at the Woodbury Outlet Malls. Even though I've been there before, and knew where my favourite stores were, I still needed at least 3 or 4 hours. I walked out with only a $15 casual dress shirt from Esprit. Pretty good deal but it sucks that I didn't have time for any more. Was hoping to find a nice comfortable pair of shoes for Asia.

The ride back was most brutal; for me especially. We left Washington at 730am, got back to Montreal at 1130pm because we were stuck at the border for 3 hours. I had to catch the 1230am bus to Toronto so I could work at 9am. My legs, back and neck were cramping up, my stomach was hurting from the constant motion, I wanted to fall asleep but I just couldn't. I got to Toronto at 630am, and slept for an hour and rushed to work. What I failed to realize was that the office was closed. I wasn't told last week, and I've never had Easter Monday off from school or from work before so I assumed everything was operating as usual. The office was empty. Sigh.

I hate Hon Adventures. I should create a Wikipedia article defining what a Hon Adventure is. I'm really looking forward to just taking a month off of work and just travel. I was really hoping to take a week off after I got laid off to get my shit together and relax for a week, but I feel like I've been so much busier unemployed during those 3 weeks. My good friend Hannah's traveling Asia right now and it sounds like she's having so much fun learning. I was hoping to meet up with her before she came back to TO, but we'll JUST miss each other. It's too bad, but I'm hoping to experience some of what she's experiencing right now. You can read about her adventures here.

Someone at work told me about Grooveshark. It's really amazing; you can type in any artist or song and you can build a playlist and embed and everything. They even have Chinese artists! Much nicer and cleaner design than iMeem. iMeem's just a mess. I'm switching over to Grooveshark for my music-of-the-moment player.

snacky in my stummy.

Ceremony - Curtis Ian and the Joy Division

It's been a pretty hectic and busy week. A bit overwhelming, to be honest. So many important decisions to make, with so little time to make them. I was really hoping to get just one week of rest and to get my shit together before the jobhunt began, but I feel like I've been running really low on sleep, and less energy to do what I want to do: finish my portfolio. I guess it's a good thing.

I've been working from home lately, and sometimes I find it hard to focus until after dinner. Another weird thing... I've never known myself to be a snacky person. I'm a meal person. I eat big meals, and that's it. I may have one or two glasses of water or a drink between meals, but no granola bars, no chocolate bars, no crackers, nothing. But for some reason, working from home is starting to change that... I constantly feel like I need something in my mouth.. (no, you dirty bastards. no.) And because I've never had a history of snacking, I have nothing in the apartment to feed that craving.

So, I've been making mini-meals. Like instant noodles or eating leftovers. I'm thinking a part of it might be procrastination at work; eating just so I'm doing anything but the work I'm supposed to. Maybe I should start doing my work at Second Cup or Williams so I'm out of the apartment...

Joy Division's Ceremony has been in my head all day. Great song. Oh and thanks for the bike ride Kyra. Gotta explore the other parts of High Park when it's not so muddy and cold. It's awesome to finally have a biking buddy.

moving along.

My glove...


Hand damage.


My left hip and my right knee. I found the knee bruise one this morning...


This morning after some healing. For some reason it looks worse than yesterday...


Had my first bike wipe-out yesterday. There was minor damage.

It was a looong Friday the 13th. With only 4 hours of sleep the night before, I had to be up for a dentist appointment. It was somewhat painful yet relaxing. I actually quite enjoy going to the dentist's for cleaning. Met up with friends for lunch, and a lot more people than I expected came out to see me. Got my stuff from my desk thanks to Jakob. Said some goodbyes, though I'm sure it won't be the last time I see any of them.

On my way home, I was biking pretty fast down Richmond, and tried to hang a right on Augusta. Because of my speed, I slowed down and took a wide right. A car was coming down the side street, also making a wide turn, so he was pretty much driving in the middle of the street. I panicked and clenched the brakes a bit too hard. My left hand beat my right hand to a full squeeze, so my front brakes locked up before my rear did, causing me to fly over my bike... That's the last thing I remember, since everything happened so fast. Next thing I knew, I was on my side, picking myself up off the pavement...

It was embarassing more than anything. Minor damage to myself, nothing too bad on the bike, and no damage to my clothes, which is really good... Though my pants looked all torn to begin with, haha. My right glove was torn.

Anyway, I went home to nurse my wounds and screamed like a girl when I put peroxide to disinfect. Took a video, but I probably won't post it. At least not right now. The night ended with video games at Rich and Jenna's til 1:30AM, then walked home.

Anyway, it's a nice day out. Gonna go for a bike ride... :D

love for work, work for love.

Getting laid off feels a lot like a break up. It doesn't matter whether you see it coming or not. The confusion in your mind keeps jumping from hate to love and love to hate. A part of you wants to just forgive and forget, move on, and be happy. To just live your life. And then suddenly, it hits you. The fact that you've put in so much effort, so much of your blood, sweat, and tears, invested so much for something that you cared for, for the sake of love for design/design for love. All that to get you where you're at now. Unemployed/broken-hearted. Relationship or job, it's the same feeling, really.

You go through certain phases. At first, you're shaken, shocked. You hate them for what happened. For doing what had to be done. For not having things done on your terms. Then you come to acceptance, to understanding, to seeing why it happened. You get the support you need. You feel better. Happiness comes back, you have fun, and you see that it's no big deal. Life goes on. But then after the support team leaves you, at the end of the night when you're in bed and with nothing else in your mind but what happened that day, you can't help but reflect upon it. And denial and disbelief come back. And it becomes a cycle of mood swings over and again until time allows you to forgive and forget.

Well, at least no bridges burned. But the thoughts in my head are still flying at light speed and hurting my head a little. It's weird to get to know a place or person so well for so long, every day and then suddenly, nothing. With that said, it's comforting to at least know that this is only something I'm going through and that I'll get through this in time. And also that I'm not the only one in this boat. LOL

keep your eyes on the prize of life.

Wow. This economy mass lay-off is for real... I and a few others are now newly unemployed. That kind messes my plans up for Asia in May... Thanks for the work experience, I guess... I was the second longest employee at the place. I guess at times like these loyalty doesn't count for much.

Well, it's not the end of the world. Money isn't everything. I want to live a meaningful life, and if that's what it takes to get there, so be it. I've met some great friends and learned a lot, so nothing was wasted. It was great working with you guys! With the industry being so small, I'm sure I'll run into you at some point, if I don't grab a beer with you first.

Thanks guys, for all your support. I love you all. I guess 2009 is the reset button for me. Fresh starts. Here's a lay-off tracker. Keep yourself in the know. Kick it up a few notches, and best of luck to you all!

the road ahead.

Shadows In Silence - Enigma

This daylight savings time change has messed up my morning routine. But hey, I don't get off work to complete darkness anymore. Only to gloomy rainy weather instead... Rode my bike for the first time last Thursday since last summer. You know, you don't realize how badly out of shape you are til you get on a bicycle.

I know to some people it may seem like a small feat, but last summer I conquered Toronto by biking up to Markham. It took me all summer to work up enough stamina and strength to do it. Now, I can barely reach my work, an 8 minute bike ride away, without feeling out of breath and having jelly legs afterwards. It's a little discouraging to think that the biking last summer was all for naught, and that I have to start from square one again. That's what I hate about seasons... But then again, I could just get on a treadmill or gymcycle during the winter months... 9_9

Below, I've posted a drivelapse that I shot during the Family Day long weekend. Aside from chatting, I had nothing better to do in the car while my uncle drove, so every thirty seconds to a minute, I would take a picture of the road ahead. I calculated it so that it would last longer than my last timelapse (3 seconds long). My arms were dead at the end of the 5.5 hour drive. I put it together tonight. It's still pretty short, but it was a nice experiment. I really need to do timelapses in shorter time intervals... sigh.



I also wanted to share this drivelapse that was done for Honda Japan's Internavi Realization. I found it via FWA. As you will see, it's pretty amateur compared to my drivelapse, hahaha... joking. This was really well done, I thought. I'm loving the music; especially Yusuke Oya's Bridge On the Planet. I can't find much of anything on Yusuke Oya though. I want that song.

new beginnings.

And so finally ends the chapter that seemed never-ending. I feel fucking fantastic. World, here I come! Life's just getting started.

do you mind.

Hey Jude - Wayne Gratz

Happy daylight savings!

I finally put in the next movie off the list. Waking Life. The movie brought me back to Professor Anthony Falikowski's philosophy class at Sheridan. I really love hearing the different concepts and perspectives of life. The movie made me reflect quite a bit afterwards.

The views and theories from some of the discussions in the movie for the most part, aren't new to me. I've read about them and learnt them in class, and different books. And I think that's why lately, I've been so self-aware, when I'm not caught up in the moment, caught up with emotions. But it's nice to get a reminder to keep my mind open to these things instead of living unconciously through life, going from one trend to another, one fad to the next.

As I was reflecting on the movie afterwards, something else came to my mind. Nothing that relevant to the movie, really. This holds true for me, but I don't know about you: Isn't it strange how much we look at ourselves in the mirror every day from our childhood until now, and yet, if we try to remember a moment when we looked at ourselves in the mirror when we were young, we really can't see that childhood face, what it looked like outside from what we've seen in photos?


Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.
— Albert Einstein

dreaming of exes and pho's.

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind Theme - Jon Brion

Had pho today. So good. Couldn't handle a large though. Had to settle for a medium. It's really too bad the prices went up at Pho Pasteur. I'd go more often if they didn't jack up the prices. I don't know where, I don't know when, but one day, I'll find a place that serves a large bowl of pho with the works for the price of a small. I'd go there every day if there was such a place. Maybe I should just move to Vietnam...

I have no idea why in the last couple of weeks I've been having so many dreams involving my past relationships. Well... maybe I do. Probably because of How I Met Your Mother. Gee eff number two has made quite a few appearances, but gee eff number three appeared this morning for the first time in a long time. So weird. Nothing really changes from dream to dream. Pretty much reflects what I hope for in life. Some mornings are a bit more disappointing than others, but hey, what's success without disappointment, right?

A fresh start is in order. Come May, the first steps to major changes in my life will take place. It's time to open my eyes and broaden my perspective on life. I'm going to do all the looking back I can now, but as soon as spring comes, I stay focused on me. I think my new motto will be Take care of your life and life will take care of you. Leap of faith, baby. Leap of faith.

sunshine.

I remember last year around this time, Huffster and I would look at the time as we got off work each day and try and see the progress of sunlight coming out earlier and earlier. Then daylight savings came and saved the day.

This year, the transition was a lot more drastic. In the past couple of weeks, I've been getting off work in darkness every day. But then out of no where today, I noticed that there was still light out. The light must've snuck up on me in the past couple of weeks since I've been working later than usual. This only means one thing. Spring and sunshine is coming!

i believe in _ _ _ _.

Je t'attends; c'est ton choix.

I swear it's going to be the last How I Met Your Mother post. It's too funny... I'd be selfish not to post this one. Neil Patrick Harris is too good...

each day gets better.

I just finished all the episodes I had on my computer of How I Met Your Mother. I now need Season 4, Episode 14... Having watched so many episodes in such a short period of time, it started to get into my head. And much like anything I do too much of, I start dreaming about it in my sleep.

This show had much to do with friends, dating, relationships, and love. As such, it brought certain people back into my life in the middle of the night. People I care for but don't get to talk to anymore, would visit me. And much like the show, we would see through past conflicts and interact with the best of each other. I would see that person as I remembered her.

But as the sun rolls out, the fog fades. And with the blink of an eye, that world, that life that felt so real, collapses. As this reality vanishes within seconds, the emotional residue would linger on for days to come.

But time will heal if we let it. After all, each day gets better.

...
The waking up is the hardest part
You roll outta bed and down on your knees
And for a moment you can hardly breathe
Wondering was she really here?
Is she standing in my room?
No she's not. Cause she's gone..

on a scale of one to ten.

Cannonball - Damien Rice

How much does he wish it true...

Am I reading into things too much, seeing what I want to see? Or are the swirling thoughts in my head actually becoming the truth...?

I've been dreaming like I'm supposed to be.
I've been staring at the sun knowing I'm lucky.

Eleven.

love and hate. life and death.

What Sarah Said - Death Cab for Cutie

I've been working long hours all week (minus Tuesday, as I didn't make it in to work..) I haven't really minded working the extra hours, since it's been pretty busy and I've actually felt really productive, for the first time in a long time. On my way home, I struck a bit of luck, if you can call it that. I found a $5 bill on the floor of the company lobby, as I was heading home. It wasn't the highlight of my day, but hey, it's something... lol

As I walked home in the rain, I caught something that made me jump. I'm one of those childish people who like to step on thin curbs to try and balance themselves. As I walked up on this sewage grate that had a curb around it, I saw a dead giant rat lying lifeless on the side of the curb.

I was pretty disgusted at first, but then as I observed it in the rain, the disgust went away and the reality of life came to me. Life is short enough for humans. I can't even imagine what life would be like for a rat... dirtay.

Times like these, I thank the force of nature I call God for making me human.

So who's gonna watch you die...?

laughter. life's remedy.

This is why How I Met Your Mother rocks ice.

i love. i do.

Endless Love - Luther Vandross & Mariah Carey

I have some Luther tonight dedicated to my loving brother who is now a married man. On paper. The reception won't be until the summer, so lots of time to prep things. The vows were exchanged at the Markham Civic Centre next to Unionville High School. Beautiful place for a beautiful couple. Congrats you two lovebirds!! Welcome to the family, Stella! It's crazy to think that I have a sister-in-law now. Maybe I'll be an uncle in a couple of years. Amayssingk.

Anyway, I've been noticing a lot more couples forming this year already. For anyone in love out there, congrats and happy loving. For anyone who hasn't found that special someone yet, keep at it. Things will come into place.

I found out about this really neat tradition in Japan through my language exchange partner. She said that in Japan on February 14th, Valentine's day, all the girls are supposed to give out gifts, cards or whatnot to guys they like. A month later, on March 14th, they have what they call White Day. That's when all the girls are waiting with anticipation for the boys to return a gift. If they do, then it's a sign that they like them back. If not, then it shows that they have no interest in them. We should have a holiday like that. You'd have a nice month to think about things, haha. You can read all about it here.

I've been watching a lot of How I Met Your Mother, lately. So hooked on it. I've been feeling a bit like Ted Mosby lately. But I need a Barney Stinson in my life to make things more entertaining... Seems like the past couple of weeks have all been about love. Maybe it's time.

il rêve toujours.

Quiet Nights And Quiet Stars - Olivia Ong

Il réveille avec un rêve qu'elle l'a dit qu'elle l'aime toujours.
C'est la deuxième fois qu'il a eu un rêve avec elle cette semaine.
Son coeur batte comme le tonnerre; il se sent lourd.
C'est-il vrai? Ou c'est-il ce qu'il le souhaîte dans son coeur?

Il ne sais pas pourquoi.
Huit mois ont déjà passé, mais chaque jour il pense à elle toujours.
Il veut sentir l'amour comme avant, mais ce n'ai pas un choix.
Il ne sent rien pour les autres.

Il réveille avec un rêve.
Un rêve de beauté.
Si beau qu'il le fait pleurer.
Il pleure sans larmes.

Il la manque beaucoup.
Son visage sourit tandit que son coeur pleure.
Il n'y a rien qu'il peut faire mais vivre,
Car, c'est la vie.

travel inspiration.

I came across the Burger King's new Whopper Virgins campaign (the above clip) via FarFar Academy blog this morning. It really made me envious of the researchers. It really made me want to travel even more than I already want. Whether this campaign was effective or not in terms of advertising, I could care less. It's a great idea, but at the same time, I don't think I'm crazy about the thought of introducing fast foods to small communities like that. It could really wreck the eco-systems of the natives.

Anyway, it really makes me think... It's really hard to believe that some areas are so remote they have no idea of what life is like outside of their culture. International pop culture? Forget it. Michael Jack-who? Kanye-what? The thought of someone not knowing how to pick up or eat a burger is all so strange to me. All so foreign. But then again, I'm seeing things through the eyes of a typical North American. Limited vision, limited knowledge, history and culture of anything outside of this continent.

The idea of experiencing something different, something foreign and new, really puts questions in my head though. This world is so diverse; why do we trap ourselves in such a life of routine and comfort? Why do we cringe at the thought of change? Whether they be cultural, environmental or biological changes, shouldn't we live to experience these differences? Why do we live to work? Shouldn't we work to live? Life's so short. Why waste it? Take that leap of faith. Whether we land or fall, isn't the experience worth it?

I've been feeling a little trapped in Toronto as of late. I thought taking a trip to Los Angeles back in September would really liberate that feeling. As much fun as I had there, it didn't help much. I think I need a break from the city to kind of reset my mind. I've been losing focus and inspiration. I need to bring some life back into my work. Not to mention my heart... Until I get the time to travel, I suppose documentaries and photos will have to hold me.

movies for the artistic soul.

Locked In A Room - Oren Lavie

Two weeks ago, I had mentioned to my co-worker Karen, the copywriter, that I had never seen The Big Lebowski before. I guess that was a big no-no in her books, as well as everyone else's in the creative department. So then she asked me if I had seen Tron. I don't recall having seen it, but maybe I have. There are a lot of movies I've seen in my childhood that I may not remember entirely; just little flashes here and there. Anyway, I haven't seen Tron either...

She flipped out and asked if I had seen Citizen Kane. And well, no, I haven't. Toni, the art director sitting across from me overheard this and flipped out on me as well. I thought maybe it was a culture thing, seeing as I come from Quebec. But Toni is from Croatia. So Karen ruled that one out...

I thought that having seen movies like Robocop, Terminator, Ninja Turtles, Batman and such was enough to keep in the loop of pop culture; and that movies like Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind or Science of Sleep would be enough to keep in the world of artistic films. I guess not, haha...

So for the next 30 to 45 minutes, Toni and Karen crowded around me desk, throwing movies at me. I ended up making a list of movies to watch based on their suggestions. And then last Friday, Toni brought over a stack of DVDs for me to borrow and watch. So that's my homework for the next little while.

The stack included:
• Fargo
• The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly
• Trainspotting
• Bladerunner
• Waking Life
• Monty Python's The Meaning of Life

Anyway, I watched The Big Lebowski a couple of weeks ago, and watched Fargo tonight. Both great movies, though I found The Big Lebowski was a bit overhyped. Maybe I was expecting it to be so epic due to everyone's reaction and disbelief when I told them I hadn't seen it yet. As for Fargo, it was amazing, though a bit too much blood for my liking. I think Waking Life will be next.

procrastination is time lapse.

Baby Be Mine - Michael Jackson

Late Friday night after some drinking, I decided that it was time for me to give myself a fun experimental project. Since my new MacBook Pro was getting loaded with goodies until Sunday morning, I decided to spend my Saturday indoors, creating a time lapse video of the street intersection outside my window.

Staying in all day worked well anyway because I woke up with a slight hangover. The only problem was that I couldn't wake up early enough for sunrise, which for a still time lapse, makes all the difference as it is the most noticeable change in lighting. Well, sunrise and sunset.

So I began in the afternoon, originally planning to take a photo every 10 minutes for 24 hours. The timing got really messed up later in the day as I would fall asleep or be playing Fable (which I cleared the story mode that night, sadly...) and forget to take a photo every 10 minutes. Other times, I would go on a frenzy, taking a photo every 30 seconds to a minute... And also, I didn't have the proper equipment to hold the camera still, so there was some drastic shifting near the end.

I didn't end up spending the full 24 hours taking photos every 10 minutes, as I was procrastinating with the XBox, then I got too tired an went to bed, since I had to wake up early for the laptop pick up, uptown.

I gave up with Veoh and opened a Vimeo account. Hopefully it'll be much better. I think I'm gonna re-upload all my videos onto Vimeo and kill of Veoh. Bad service. Also, here's a well done video on procrastination by John Kelly.

lost and not found.

Underground - Moist

My life lately feels a lot quieter... It's not that I'm complaining, because it's a good thing, really; it's more me time. But I am complaining. I'm complaining because I have all this time to myself and I've been feeling really motivated to be productive, yet I don't have the means to work on my stuff. I'm waiting on my new laptop, which comes in Wednesday. According to the tracker, it is currently in Alaska...

To pass time, I started playing Fable II to give it a try. I haven't really played an RPG since Neverwinter Nights, about five years ago. Why's that? Because when I get into these games, they can really consume me. As much as I've always wanted to try World of Warcraft, I never played it for the said reason. But with Fable, I thought meh... I'll have self-control.

No. I stayed up until 3:30am two nights in a row playing this game so I could buy a house for my character. It hurts me to see myself on that couch for 5 hours straight on that game. Especially when I work the next morning. I've lost my mind...

I went to Mississauga to chill with my good friends from Kingston today. Good times. We went to Playdium and DDR'ed it up and played some sick racing games with full steering wheel feedback and bucket seats rocking. Jolly good times, I say. We saw some serious kids on this DDR machine though. These kids meant business. They brought towels, change of shirts and shoes, and even a bottle of Windex (why?)... They set the game on uber hard and just stepped up a storm! Those arrows were traveling at least 50km/hr. No wonder kids these days have short attention spans. I took a video of them. I caught them at a less intense part though.

I've become quite absent-minded this week. I keep misplacing and losing things. I lost my January TTC Metropass, I misplaced my penicillin Thursday and was 30 minutes late for work, and then I lost the whole bottle today. Probably at Playdium. And of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most.

cyberdyne systems model 101

The Cranberries - Dreams

Happy New Year to all you Asians and non-Asians who celebrate it!!

Surgery complete! Thank God I was all drugged up and passed out; it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. The parts that bothered me most was the needle that stayed in my arm the whole time, and the fact that I was half awake here and there during the procedure. I hate needles... That was most uncomfortable; though I'm sure 50-75% of it was psychological. I wasn't as sleepy after the operation as when I got my wisdom teeth taken out years back.

There's a subtle taste of blood in my mouth still, and minor swelling. I'm quite drowsy too, but I wanted to post up some photos before napping. I originally wanted to ask the nurses to take a couple of photos or videos of the procedure, but I guess I didn't really want them distracted from the operation either so I decided not to ask. Instead, I took before and after photos.

The crown hasn't been put in yet. So far they've drilled the screw and plate into place. They even showed me the x-ray afterwards. Kinda cool, but gross at the same time. Luckily I didn't need bone grafting. Another appointment next week for them to check up on how it is, and hopefully things will go smoothly from there.

No solid foods and alcohol for a week, at least. Sorry Karen, I'll have to bowl sober at your birthday party... Another day of rest tomorrow, then it's back to work. And lunches? Nothing but congee. And maybe pho... It'd have to be without the beef though, sadly.. It is time for this T-800/Model 101 to recharge its battery. I'll be back.

Click to view high resolution versions...

Before...


After...


After...


After...

update.

1963 - Rachael Yamagata

Some of you may have noticed on my Twitter that I wrote I'm not drinking beer til summer. Everyone laughed, but it is happening. I might have an occasional mixed drink or glass of wine, but in terms of beer, and also getting plastered in general, that will have to stay to a minimal. Come February, I'll be fully recovered from surgery, I'm going to start a cleanse and see how it goes, and dedicate more time on being active and try and live a healthier lifestyle.

I know, I know. I said that last March, one or two entries into my first blog posts... But like I said before, 2009 is the Year of Execution. No more delays. Get into shape, no more crap food, and save! Maybe I'm too ambitious? Worth a try. At least til the summer anyway.

I noticed today the freelance project I did months back for Honda Fit is up on the fitisgo.ca website. Apparently, it's been up for a long while now. It also won an FWA. You can read more about it in my other blog.

I also put in my order for the new 15" Macbook Pro!! Soooo~ Sometime next week, I'll get it. Exciting!! I'm doing my part in helping out the economy. Are you?

Lastly, I'd like to share a hilarious music video with you. My good friend Miguel sent me the song today, and I youtubed it when I got home, the video makes the song that much funnier. And that boy T-Pain can dance!! Note: This video is one of the reasons I'm giving up beer. Haha...

One More Drink - Ludacris ft. T-Pain